Archives For Dr. Don Worcester

 

 

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My oldest daughter just returned from France. She was part of a

Language Exchange program. She brought back the Eiffel Tower, on a

Keychain.

There are only two ways to make an Eiffel Tower Keychain

1) Find a very large Keychain

2) Make a very small Eiffel Tower.

My daughter went with option # 2.

It’s a cool Keychain and a sweet gift but at that size it should be called an

Eiffel Miniature not an Eiffel Tower.

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Big things lose something when

you put them on a Keychain.

Love is a Big Thing, a really Big Thing.

It doesn’t really fit on a keychain.

It doesn’t belong there.

What kind of love are you carrying?

 

If the love in your life is not constraining you from false comforts

and harmful habits, it’s probably Keychain Love

 

If your love is not compelling you into places that are uncomfortable,

inconvenient and costly, it may be Keychain Love.

 

If you are not moving out of selfish behavior and into serving

behavior, it could be Keychain Love.

 

If you are avoiding hard truths to keep everyone happy, to keep the

peace, even a “false peace”, it might be Keychain Love

 

If you spend more time confronting than confessing

 

If you would rather win the argument than the relationship

 

If you think that Point of all discussions, is to make your Point

 

If you have built a reputation with your abilities

while hiding and denying your vulnerabilities

 

You might have drifted into Keychain Love.

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I John 4:8 tells us that God is Love and you will not find Him at the

end of a Keychain.

 

Are we letting God grow our hearts bigger?

 

Are we praying for more love or are we shrinking our relationships to

Keychain Size?

 

Our daughters want and need more than a “souvenir relationship” with us.

Let’s break out the Big Love,

the Bold Love,

the Crazy Good Love.

The kind that will never fit

on the end of a Keychain!

 

Grace & Peace,

Dr. don Worcester

 

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Road Trips

Dr. Don Worcester —  May 6, 2016 — Leave a comment

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Differences create tension.

Tension is uncomfortable.

Ignoring or erasing the differences will

Reduce the tension and restore the

Comfort.

This process will create greater Ease.

Ease is desirable and attainable.

If we eliminate differences

It will be Easy!

 

But will it be Good?

Will it be amazing and great?

Will it be ripe with life giving energy?

Probably not,

But it will be Easy and Comfortable.

 

So…. What if we don’t ignore, erase or eliminate the differences?

What if we decide to recognize and

Welcome the differences?

What if we saw the differences as

challenging not threatening?

What if we cared more about the 

      Capacity we could have together,                 

       than the comfort we could have 

        apart?

What if we decide to live with the tension rather than eliminate it?

 

To live with Tension requires Intentional living.

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This is harder and better living.

 

Our lives do not get better, richer or fuller because we eliminate differences. They get better when we Integrate differences. 

 

Only something more powerful and compelling than our individual differences can bind us and blend us into more than ourselves.

 

Personal happiness is a natural by product of a great marriage but it’s a lousy compass for daily living. The Road to ” Happily Ever After” travels through some wild and wooly terrain.

 

Traveling with differences means we will learn to:

Set a common direction,

Recover from disappointments,

Stay courageous and hopeful through rough seasons,

Cultivate joy and purpose in our daily routines and rhythm

Stay connected through conflict

Give fresh starts to one another in our life together.

 

The road to “Happily Ever After” has bumps, twists and turns.

There may be some sections with little service.

You may encounter severe weather.

The road itself may become difficult to find and follow in certain sections.

There may be encounters with locals who are hostile to your presence.

Your vehicle will likely experience some damage along the way,

you will need to make repairs and get back on the road.

Some days you will cruise along with little effort

other days you will crawl and creep forward expending all the energy you have.

 

Why travel such a road?….because of the destination.

Dads and husbands are invited into the Ultimate Road Trip.

Our daughters are on this journey with us.

They are learning about life and faith and love by watching us

and by being with us.

They are learning what does and doesn’t matter in their life and in their relationships.

They are learning how to give and receive love.

They are learning how to stay the course and how to put their trust in the One who calls them,

because He is trustworthy.

All of this will lead them to a great destination.

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Sometimes a hard roads lead to a beautiful place.

If you do not believe in the beauty of the destination, 

you may just look for a beautiful road.

A Beautiful destination is the real reward of any good journey.

So let’s top off the tank,

roll down the windows

and turn up the music;

it’s a great day

for a Road Trip.

 

Grace and Peace,

Dr. Don Worcester

Borrowed Light

Dr. Don Worcester —  April 22, 2016 — Leave a comment

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A full moon is often beautiful and brilliant in the night sky. Moonlight has made it into our songs, our stories and into our imaginations.

The moon appears “self-luminous” but we know it is borrowed light that makes it shine. The Moon appears bright because the sun is very, very, very bright.

Borrowed light is still light. An object that poorly reflects something blazing and brilliant is still casting light in a dark night sky.

I need no apology from the moon.

It is the brightest light in the evening sky. It is limited, not defective. It generates no light of it’s own, it is a reminder in the dark, that the True Light is still shining, that the dawn is coming.

Moonlight is a deposit, a down payment towards a brighter day that has not yet arrived; it’s a promise in the night that the dawn is coming.

 

The light from the moon waxes and wanes over the days and weeks of its lunar calendar. The moon is on it’s own journey, it is not a fixture but an object in motion. We only see part of the moon part of the time. The fullest and brightest moon on the clearest night is still not fully illuminated; there is still a dark side.

 

The moon is a lesser light that reflects a greater one. All of creation is a poor reflection of a magnificent Creator.

When the Creator and the creation are fully reconciled, the lesser things will fall away. The scaffolding is no longer needed once the Cathedral is finished.

The lesser things will fall away at the arrival of the One and Only. The sun, moon and stars will be released, their mission fulfilled, marriage will be released as the wedding feast of the Lamb begins, time and pain and tears will all evaporate as the Eternal, Good and Beautiful King welcomed us by name into His Kingdom and Reign.

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This is not a fairy tale or fabricated happy ending. This is not a Cosmic, Mystical hug generated from a vague sense of well-being and well wishes.

This is a Coronation Celebration, with all of creation on its knee’s confessing and welcoming the return of the King.

 

Great dad’s also live and love from borrowed light. No apology for not being the source. We can still be bright lights in a dark sky. Most of us have a dark side, we are prone to wax and wane. Some nights we shine full and bright, some nights we can reflect only a sliver of light.

 

Our imperfect and inconsistent love is a reminder in the dark that a greater love is coming. It’s the job we have been given as dads. Let’s stay the course. There really is a Man in the Moon. He’s a dad with a daughter.

 

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Shine on!

 

Grace and Peace,

Dr. Don Worcester

Launching

Dr. Don Worcester —  April 15, 2016 — Leave a comment

When I was in grade school the U.S. was in a big time Space Race with

Russia. The moon was the prize and when the Apollo Rockets launched

the whole country tuned in to watch the spectacle and glory of the

Count Down, Ignition and Lift Off.

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There are hundreds of famous images from that era; Astronauts, Mission

Control, Space Capsules, News Anchors and the strong and beautiful

Apollo Rockets lifting off with power, grace and promise. There are

lots of stirring photos. There is one important thing rarely featured in the Apollo archives,

the Launch Pad.

 

When a Launch Pad does it’s job, it mostly goes unnoticed. This kind

of make sense given that Launch Pads are not designed to launch

themselves, they have a more important role.

A role that is central to the whole mission.

 

They stay grounded to help something else fly.

 

They absorb the fiery blast that comes with every new launch.

 

They are on site and along side for the whole preparation and count

down process.

 

They set the trajectory for the right path.

The direction at lift off

will determine much of the journey.

 

They get to hold something close that is truly beautiful and powerful.

Something filled with promise and purpose. Something designed to fly,

to travel further and faster and farther than our eyes can see. They

get the best view

and the last view of

a successful launch.

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A Launch Pad has a good gig, so does any dad with a daughter. A Launch

Pad or a dad without scorch marks has probably not been in active

service. It is part of the gig. So let’s stay at it.

I don’t know any dads who do not sometimes feel a bit clumsy or stiff

in their efforts to connect, support, lead, love and launch their

girls. But I do know this, nothing launches without a Launch Pad!

 

The race to the moon was important, but if you are parenting a

daughter today, you are in a much bigger and better Race. Let’s show

up with the best stuff we have, the stakes couldn’t be higher.

 

Grace and Peace,

Dr. Don Worcester

 

Man Cave

Dr. Don Worcester —  April 1, 2016 — 1 Comment

 

I have a good friend in Phoenix who runs a great business from a building he bought and redesigned.The

building does everything he needs it to do for his operation, but it has a bonus feature that is truly magnificent, a Man Cave.

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This room is brimming with Testosterone. I am pretty sure my T levels went up ten points the first time I walked in the door. Even the air seemed more masculine in this place. A visit to a Man Cave can be a fun and pleasant diversion.  But if you stay too long in a Man Cave, you run the risk of becoming a Cave Man.

In the Old Testament a prophet by the name of Elijah found his way to a Man Cave (I Kings 19). He had been working hard to serve his community, to do it right and to make a difference. But by the time he reached his Man Cave he was pretty wiped out, pretty discouraged and pretty done. God made an unscheduled appearance and asked a simple but significant question, ” What are you doing here Elijah?”

Elijah responded with a pattern and complaint that I recognize in myself. He began by explaining his good intentions, his hard work and his noble character. Then he complained about everyone else, their bad behavior and lousy attitudes. Finally he finished with a tragic and whiney comment about being ” the only one who cares”. These are Cave Man thoughts. They form in the dark, they take root in isolation, they are self-validating and turn us into dull brutes. Cave Men are ruled by their appetites and their fears. They are not fit company for our daughters.

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To draw Elijah from the cave, God whispered his name. This was not a Power Encounter but a Personal Encounter. He was given a simple but clear charge, ” Go back from where you came.” Elijah was encouraged and reminded that God was up to more than he knew. God is always doing more in us and through us than we perceive. So let’s go back from where we came. Let’s get up and get on with it.

Lets lose the self-endorsing chatter in our heads about our great character and noble intentions.

Let’s quit whining about the whiners.

Let’s be Joyful Saints and not Miserable Martyrs when we show up to serve.

Our Daughters deserve good men and great dads.

So enjoy a visit to your local Man Cave. Take a good deep breath and enjoy the earthy masculine dimension of your male soul.

Then head back and Man Up, we’ve got work to do.

 

Peace and Grace

Dr. Don Worcester

 

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Prospecting

Dr. Don Worcester —  March 11, 2016 — Leave a comment

Treasure hunting comes pretty naturally for most men. Much of the world was discovered and settled because men were dreaming, searching or chasing after some pile of gold, City of Gold or rumor of gold in some far away place. So it was probably not a big surprise that I picked a stop on our family vacation that offered the chance to, “Pan for Gold.” The attendant was dressed as a Prospector and explained that for 10 bucks we would be given a 5-pound bag of sand, a Gold Pan and a lesson on Prospecting. He also assured us that each bag had Real Gold somewhere in the mix. I bought several bags, and we began Prospecting.

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It turns out that a pile of dirt, with the Gold flakes in it, looks a lot like a pile of dirt.

It takes skill and patience and practice to separate the sand from the gold. A man without skill will lose the gold with the sand. A man without patience will quit before the gold is revealed. A man who doesn’t practice these skills will miss the treasure right in front of him. Good dads are good Prospectors. They know there is gold in their daughter’s hearts. They are committed to sifting through a whole bag of ordinary life to find the treasure hidden inside.

 

The questions we asked our daughters will help us sort out and separate the sand from the gold. We should always ask our daughters about their activities, their schedules, their plans and their behaviors.

 

“What did you do today? ”

“ How did Volleyball go?”

“ Do you want to go to the Skate Party on Saturday?”

 

If we want to connect with their hearts, we need to ask questions that help reveal their hearts. Andy Stanley in his book, Enemies of the Heart suggest some good questions to consider.

 

“ Is everything okay in your heart?”

“Did anybody hurt your feelings today?”

“Are you mad at anybody?”

“Did anybody break a promise to you today?”

“Is there anything you need to tell me?”

“ Is there anyone you would like to see fail?”

Let’s keep Prospecting with our daughters. Let’s not be satisfied with simple and easy exchanges. There is real gold in their hearts, let’s keep working until we find it.

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Grace and Peace

Dr. Don Worcester

 

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