I write my Wednesday blog posts from the eyes of girls. I am one myself, and I have worked with teenage girls for over 20 years. Dads, want to know what your girls are thinking??
Today I sent text messages to several high school girls because I wanted to hear from them on this question. “What do you really want from your dad”. My phone blew up with responses – girls want you to know this stuff!
It is not a new phone, it is not a car, it is not anything fancy and it is not something you can buy.
Dads, you can give your girls things they can’t get anywhere else. The below text messages are some direct quotes I received in response to “What do you really want from your dad” from teenage girls:
“To be supportive in everything that i do, and know that when i’m pushing him away that’s when i need him most. To give me great advice!”
“I just want the endless love and support my daddy gives me:)”
“I want to be able to say “when I grow up I want to marry a man who loves me like my dad loves my mom””
“I want to know that my dad is proud of me, and loves me for who I am”
“A “perfect” dad in my eyes is one that sees their little girl as the most beautiful girl they have ever seen. They also have to trust their daughters”
“attention, positive feedback, engage in their life, this is simple but, always tell them you love them”
“I want my dad to take time in investing in my life. Just a special time for me and my dad.”
“I wish he would come ask me about things in my life more than me having to initiate conversations.”
“Tell me he loves and cares for me, so I know I have at least one person out there who does”
Good stuff dads! I am trying to take some of the guess-work out of what your daughter needs and wants most from you. Girls of ALL ages are searching for positive attention, unconditional love and acceptance, someone to listen to them, to support them, and to cheer them on. Only God the Father can offer this perfectly, but you as a dad can give your girls a glimpse of this perfect kind of love. In all honesty, they are not getting these things other places. The world is full of examples of girls getting attention and love in all the wrong ways. Girls of all ages constantly compare themselves to others as well as the unattainable standards set by the media – they need a relationship where they feel supported, loved and appreciated for who they are at their core. You can offer these things your girls are craving. You GET to be the person who offers this kind of relationship to your daughter. You don’t want her searching for these things somewhere else! She needs you to engage. Thanks for stepping up dads!
PS – In the book Prized Possession, there is additional information from girls and what they are looking for in their relationship with their fathers.