Parenting is a Contact Sport. We need to watch, listen and engage our daughters in personal and meaningful ways. Our primary job is not to distribute information, but to cultivate character, capacity and genuine faith. We get to parent our daughters for a limited number of years, once they leave our homes, they will need to parent themselves. To this end, good questions will serve them better than good answers. We need to keep asking the questions that we hope they will ask themselves long after they have left our living rooms and kitchens. Below is a sample list of questions to prime the pump.
Ages 0 to 6
Could you look at me?
What do you say? (For please and thank you, etc.)
Is that kind? Is that gentle?
Is that a happy heart?
Ages 6 to 12
Could you try that again?
Can you find your courage?
Can you ask questions and use kind words?
Ages 12 to 18
How do you think that went?
What did you notice in that relationship?
What would you do next time?
Ages 18 to 24 (and above)
What are you learning?
How can I help you?
How do you know if this is where you should be?
Good questions for ANY stage
How is your heart?
Is there anyone you need to forgive?
Are you anxious about anything?
Do you secretly want someone to fail?
How can I pray for you? (And then pray out loud)
What are you enjoying?
What do you think God is up to?
Themes at any stage
Older serves younger, younger respects older
Second chances are a must
Our life is bigger than us
We have plenty
People are more important than things
Love is a choice
Bad behavior is always a bad idea
Laughter is necessary
God and your family love you
Our daughters are growing up. They will hopefully reach important milestones
along the way, but for all of their growth and accomplishments they will not receive from us or from Life a “Certificate of Completion.” These Certificates are also unavailable to dads. We get to hand off and pour in the best that we have. We get to hope and pray that our efforts will stir up and lay down a foundation our daughters can live on and grow from the rest of their lives.
Let’s keep looking up and falling forward.
Grace and Peace,
Dr. Don Worcester
