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Recently we had a magical day at the Magic Kingdom. You may remember a previous blog post where I shared about “Rosa” and her girls and the privilege he have had to walk with her for the last 5 years. To catch yourself up, READ HERE. Despite her circumstances, she has done a great job in raising her sweet girls. The odds are clearly against her and she is battling. I am proud of her.

Recently it was her girl’s birthday. They are one year apart, yet nearly share the same day of birth. They are now 4 and 5 years old and secretly we have been waiting for them to get old enough to take them to Disneyland. A day at Disneyland is clearly far out of their reach and we couldn’t wait to make this happen. Incidentally, Rosa (mom) has never been there either, so we were excited to take them all.

After we parked our car, we boarded the tram taking us to the main gate. Rosa said, “I am so excited I want to scream!” We barely got out of the parking structure and the excitement was nearly boiling over!  We started off with the iconic and obligatory picture in front of the park with the ever watchful Mickey made of flowers.

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Next up was the standard picture in front of the castle and the magic was on!

Alan with girls

Before we waited in long lines for short age appropriate rides, we made the rounds seeing the available Princesses. The girls knew them all and they loved seeing the “real ones” in person.

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We took pictures and got autographs. The Princesses were sweet and engaging. The girls LOVED it.

Here are a few brief thoughts that I hope these girls will one day know. Likewise, I hope your daughter knows this and I hope that you will help in this process of understanding.

The truth is that these two young girls are the real Princesses. Not the kind that wear poofy dresses or have theme music. And not the kind that customers stand in line to see. They are not the kind of Princess that will appear as an action figure, on lunch boxes & underwear or star in a movie.

They are the real kind of Princesses. In the system of royalty, a Princess is the daughter of the King. The King is in charge and commands respect. Everyone bows to the King because of his position. In the system of the Universe, God is King and one day every knee will bend and every tongue will confess this true. He commands respect because of His position.

In the bible, there are numerous references where God & Jesus refers to us people as “Child” and “Daughter.” A daughter of the King is a Princess!

These sweet girls I took to Disneyland are Princesses in the Universe. And your daughter is as well. My hope and prayer is that our girls will understand their rightful place in the universe and live into it. They should be respected and honored as a daughter of the King. And they should not pay any attention to anyone who does not treat them with the same respect. Maybe you could remind your girl of this fact.

Be the protector and defender of Royalty!

Long live the King!

Alan

The Holiday’s are upon us. Get some fun and meaningful gifts for the Dad’s you know.

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In just two short days you can participate in a ground breaking event!

We have a HUGE announcement for the My Father Daughter audience. You may or may not know that Kristy and I have developed a live seminar for Dad’s. It is loosely based on the table of contents of our book PRIZED POSSESSION. Our seminar has been very well received each time we have done it. We recently gave this seminar in Thousand Oaks, Ca, and below is some of the feedback we heard from the Dads in the audience.

“Thank you for the encouragement. You opened my eyes to things that I need to know”

“I feel equipped to engage”

“Good best practices”

“Very informative, great job”

“It really opened my eyes at the importance of being a more prominent part of my daughter’s life”

“This was great motivation to finish well. Thank you for the blessing”

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Inevitably each time we have done this, people say “Hey, when are you doing this again!? I have three friends who need to hear this.”

The HUGE announcement is that we are conducting our first Webinar on November 12. If you have been to our seminar, it will be very similar in content, only delivered in a Webinar format. We are excited about this and hopeful we can reach more Dads through this format.

Space is very limited so if you would like to participate, just hit the link below. And of course you can forward this to anyone you think would benefit from this conversation. The target is Dads who have daughters, but really anyone is welcome to jump in.

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If you know you want to get in on this but you are unavailable on November 12, it will be recorded and able to be viewed later.

Thanks for leaning in and stepping up as a great Dad!

Alan
If you want to pick up our book, you can hit the link below!

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A while back, Benji Cowart burst onto the Social Media scene with his parody of a popular song titled “RUDE.” He rewrote a pop song origionally done by the group MAGIC! but with a protective Dad’s twist on it. Because of this blog, dozens of people shared his YOU TUBE sensation with me and said “I saw this and thought of you.”

They were correct, I loved his version and immediately began my search for this creative song writer. I found him online and we exchanged a few e-mails. I asked him if he would like to write a guest post for this blog sharing the behind the scenes story of how and why he wrote the song. Below are his words telling his story.

But first, let’s all re live the “magic” of the song that went viral. Or in case you are the one person who didn’t see it the first time, watch below and then read his words.

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In case you can’t veiw the YOUTUBE video above, hit THIS LINK.

From Benji

The first time I heard the song Rude by the band Magic!, it was recommended to me by a friend but not because of the lyric, but because of the guitar tone on the solo. Its’ always about the tone.  And he was right, the lead guitarist for Magic! has an amazing guitar tone.  It was only after listening to the song a couple of times before I started catching the story in the lyric and more specifically, the “I’m gonna marry her anyway” line.

I don’t know if it’s due to the consistent portrayal of dad’s as total boobs in the media or it’s the constant theme in the news headlines of dad’s just having to put up with blatant disrespect and not being able to do anything about it, but something rose up in me when I heard that lyric.  The song is so brilliantly hooky that I couldn’t get it out of my head and I started singing it around the house but started messing with the lyrics to make my kids laugh (which is a common “dad joke” around our house.)

The more I messed with it, the more I realized that what I was singing was kinda funny. So I looked the entire song lyric up online and downloaded Magic!’s version (paid for it…which by the way, if you’re not paying for music that you download, you are stealing it…rant over).  From there, I channeled my inner redneck and re-wrote the entire song to give a comically exaggerated version of a how the dad might respond to a young man saying “I’m gonna marry her anyway”.

The aftermath

So as I write this blog entry, the youtube video that I posted of Rude (A Dad’s Response) has over 11 million views. In the two weeks after posting it, we were phone/facetime interviewed by multiple national news affiliates, the video has been shown on all kinds of major internet websites, and it even got played on Good Morning America.  Maybe the most interesting part of this journey has been the conversation on the Youtube comments section (which I only recommend to a mature audience because it is not for the faint of heart).  I have gotten plenty of negative comments ranging from young men outright challenging me to a fight, to other Christians calling me a hypocrite because I am claiming to be a Christian who is advocating murder. IT’S A PARODY PEOPLE!!!

But there has also been an overwhelming amount of positive comments ranging from dads saying “Yes, I have a baby daughter but you just gave me a theme song for when she’s old enough to date” to comments from adult daughters saying “I am a divorcee and I wish my dad had stepped up like that when I was dating my ex-husband”.

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More importantly, with both negative and positive comments, there has been a conversation. A worthy conversation about dads and daughters and young men and respect.  That conversation alone has made this whole thing worth it.

As a dad, I will always protect my daughter. I hope I’ll never have to be in a situation where I’d have protect my daughter to the point of taking a life but I do know beyond the shadow of a doubt that I would give my life for that little girl.  Hopefully, if I love her as I should and treat her like the treasure that she is, then the bar will be high for the kind of man that she will be drawn to some day.

Benji Cowart

 

Benji can be found on facebook and I-tunes where you can enjoy other recordings of his muisc.

 

If you want to look deeper into the convesation of raising a healthy daughter, pick up our book, “Prized Possession” by hitting the link below. We also have a fun store  to pick up some Daddy/Daughter gear.

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Know Your Row

Alan Smyth —  August 29, 2014 — Leave a comment

I have long legs and I tend to fly Southwest Airlines. Now I don’t really mind having long legs and I generally prefer flying Southwest over other carriers. There is however no real First Class Seating on these flights. So I usually go for the Early Bird Check-In to improve my options on seat selection.

Some people like to board early so they can sit in the front of the plane. They get their snacks first, they’re close to the bathroom and they are the first off the plane once it touches down. I get this strategy and the perks that come with front row seats. But, personally I am an Exit Row Guy. The leg room on the Exit Row is awesome.

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Then there is a little extra attention from the Cabin Crew and a little ceremony swearing  you in as an “Emergency Exit Row Passenger.” In the event of an emergency landing, you and your fellow Exit Row Passengers are asked to confirm that you are able and willing to assist in the deployment of the planes safety equipment. Each person is required to say Yes, out loud to the Flight Attendant.

This is all part of the package when you choose this row. If you’re a dad with a daughter, you are always sitting on the Emergency Exit Row. This is your permanent assigned seat. You might have signed up for the extra legroom and missed the Swearing In Ceremony, but it happened or it should have.  A few other reminders to help you enjoy your flight:

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All dads are Frequent Flyers. You will spend lots of time in the air. This is part of the package. In preparation for Take Off please turn off all Cell Phones along with other mobile devices. In case of turbulence the Captain will turn on the Seat Belt sign, please return to your seat. Swearing In is better than swearing. You will need to say “Yes” out loud to your duties and responsibilities. In preparation for landing please turn off your devices, put your Tray Tables up and return your seat to it’s full, upright and locked position.

If you are a dad with a daughter, Know Your Row and take your seat. When things get dicey and fellow passengers get agitated, confused or panicked, you are on duty. You have been Sworn In,  you said Yes out loud to your crew. You are not aloud to check out, freak out or blow out. You are an Emergency Exit Row Dad. So stretch out your legs, feast on your peanuts and sip your complimentary beverage.

You’re sitting in a First Class Seat

Grace & Peace Dr. Don Worcester

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On July 7, I posted THIS BLOG in response to the “Feminist Father” shirt that had recently gone around on the web. In case you missed it, please catch yourself up and read my response.

The “Feminist Father” shirt was posted again on a popular blog and hailed it as a great message. So, because I had nothing else better to do at the moment, I lobbed a few thoughts and bantered with a few people about our “10 Rules for Dating my Daughter” shirt as well as our book “Prized Possession.”

It’s safe to say that I was going against the grain with most of this particular audience. Below are a few of the excerpts.

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In response to the 10 Rules shirt picture, “Brian” said this.

“You get a f***ing lawyer you A**hole”

“She isn’t your f***ing princess either, lizard brain”

“Not a joke shirt. Actually it’s pretty condescending and demanding.”

Then “Ryan” jumped in and said this to “Brian”.

“you seem like a bit of a loser. If someone like you dated my daughter I would put that person in the hospital.”

“Alyssa” jumped in and said this.

“You obviously don’t have a daughter, your shirt screams creepy, tacky and highly disrespectful to me.”

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Then I said this.

“Alyssa – yes I have a 26 year old daughter. She thinks this is funny. She is doing fantastic out in the world. This shirt was created as a JOKE. Lots of Dads find this funny! Of course no one is endorsing actual violence or intimidation. It is HAHAHAHAHA. Thousands of Dads in 58 countries agree with me. Please read through the blog that the shirt came out of before you pass judgment.” www.myfatherdaughter.com

 

“Ron” jumped in and said this.

“Alan, I’ve seen your shirt before and absolutely love it. In a society that is horribly one-sided (as the above comments clearly show) Thank your for your bravery to stand up for what you believe in.”

Casey then joined in with this.

“I’ve got two daughters, I’m a mother and I agree! I like it. Especially #9. Hilarious. Not that I’ve been to jail…. Brian, get over yourself.”

So many responses to one silly shirt. So many takes on a parent’s responsibility. My hope and prayer is that we will have a society of Dad’s moving closer to their daughters and further embracing their God given responsibilities as Dad’s.

Press On

Alan

In honor of this spirited conversation. Hit the link below and enter “20” at check out. I will give you 20% off of your entire order in our store!

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Barbie = Real Life?

Alan Smyth —  May 19, 2014 — 3 Comments

I grew up playing with GI-Joes. I had all the accessories. I had the jeep, raft & helicopter as well as all the GI-Joe weapons. They battled relentlessly against each other in my mind and in my living room. I even set them up outside and lobbed fire crackers at them as we secured the beach head! Growing up in a family with only boys, I never experienced the “other side.” I was only slightly aware of Barbie dolls and imagined little girls dressing them up and changing their outfits over and over. I guess that was fun for girls? I needed a little more action for my dolls. I doubt many little girls were lobbing fire crackers at their den of Barbie’s in order to secure an important victory on the battle field.

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Now that I am co-authoring this blog and have collaborated on a book focused on fathers raising daughters, I have become more aware and interested in the environment surrounding our girls. A friend recently passed along some interesting facts on the Barbie doll.

*Barbie was invented in 1959 and there are two Barbie dolls sold every second.

*The target market for Barbie is girls age 3-12

*A girl gets her first Barbie at age 3 and collects a total of 7 dolls

*If Barbie was an actual woman, she would be 5’9” tall, have a 39” bust, 18” waist, 33” hips and a size 3 shoe.

*Barbie calls this this “full figure” and likes her weight at 110 lbs.

*At 5’9” tall and weighing 110 lbs., Barbie would have a BMI of 16.24 and fit the weight criteria for anorexia. She likely would not menstruate.

*Slumber party Barbie was introduced in 1965 and came with a bathroom scale permanently set at 110 lbs. with a book entitled “How to Lose Weight” with directions inside stating simply “Don’t eat.”

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Am I somehow against Barbie Dolls? Absolutely NOT.  This blog is not about crusading against anything in particular. It is meant to encourage, inspire and bring awareness to important issues. If anything, you should probably go out and purchase a Barbie. Use it as a teaching tool for your daughter. Use it as a tangible example of what is NOT real and let that help you calibrate your daughter’s expectations. (And your sons for that matter)

Please Dad’s, stay vigilant in the environment around your daughter. Focus on interpreting the messages she receives every single day. You can point to things with a chuckle and say, “Can you believe that? That’s not even real!” Speak truth to your daughter as often as possible.

Press On

Alan Smyth

PS: Dr. Don Worcester, co-author of this blog has extensive experience and expertise in the area of eating dis orders. You can go to our website to get his contact information if you are in need of some deeper conversation on this topic. Look under “Site contributors” at www.myfatherdaughter.com

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