O Holy Night

Dr. Don Worcester —  December 19, 2014 — Leave a comment

“For no Word from God will ever fail.” -Gabriel

 

“I am the Lord’s servant, may your Word to me be fulfilled.”- Mary

 

“And the Word became Flesh and made his dwelling among us”- John

 

Mary was a teenage girl from a very small town with a short résumé and a simple life. It’s a little hard even now to believe that God’s Master Plan to bring Salvation to all of Human Kind hinged on a conversation and an encounter with an inexperienced 14-year-old girl named Mary. There were many things that Mary did not know and did not bring to a role of this magnitude. She did however bring the essential qualities,

the qualities that matter most to God.

Mary was able to Believe, to Receive and to Deliver. She said yes to God’s invitation and a miracle called Christmas unfolded. A Teenage Virgin gives birth to the Author of Life in the back of a barn and the fate of a lost and dying world is changed forever. Oh Holy Night! How are you doing with the Essential qualities?

 

How are you doing at Believing? Jesus described believing as the essential work for all Believers. All the other work we do is secondary to believing in the one whom God has sent.

We should expect to battle doubt as we do the work of believing. Expect doubt to stock you and block you and sometimes even rock you. We are going in the right direction as long as we don’t make peace with unbelief.

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How are you doing at Receiving? A gift of any size has to be both given and received. Mary received the fullness of the gift that God offered. Are you as ready to receive what God is bringing to your life? Are you able to pray as simply and boldly and clearly as Mary? “May your word to me be fulfilled.”?

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How has your delivery been? What kind of attitude have you been delivering during this Holiday Season? What values and priorities are you modeling and presenting on the Home Front. There is usually some measure of labor before a successful delivery. Keep breathing, keep focused and keep going.

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Let’s bring the essential qualities to our homes and to our Christmas Celebrations. There will be plenty of distractions, don’t be distracted by the distractions.

 

 

Mary was a good model.

She believed the Word that cannot, will not and does not fail.

She received and carried the very Good News of God’s gift to all people

And she delivered that gift on Christmas Day; His name is Emmanuel, God with us, Jesus.

 

We have received the same invitation as Mary.

We live in the same deeply loved and deeply broken world

and it is still looking for the Peace and the Joy announced by the angels on that first Holy Night.

 

Make it a Mary Christmas,

 

Grace and Peace,

Dr. Don Worcester

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Does your daughter know she is a masterpiece?

Here are some stats:

– It is estimated that 50% of 4th grade girls have been on a diet

– Dove reports that 90% of women 15-64 worldwide want to change at least 1 aspect of physical appearance with body weight being the highest

– 67% – 2/3 of women withdraw from engaging in life activities because they feel bad about themselves. Apparently, more than half of us women don’t do things because we don’t like who we are!

Some women and girls around you may not be living fully because they may be paralyzed by their thoughts and held captive by their insecurities and negative self-talk. We compare ourselves to the ‘standard’ or ‘ideal’ that the world around us has set and when we don’t fit that mold we lose confidence, we doubt ourselves, and we don’t live out who we were created to be. Insecurity has become a silent killer of girls and even older women today.

When we listen to the world around us and not God or others in our life who value us, it is easy to start seeing ourselves for less than what we are and less than what God made us to be, a masterpiece!

We are no accident. We are wonderfully made, what a concept! This is a starting point. Many girls have never thought of themselves as a masterpiece, as a work of beauty, or even as valuable at all. Their value has been in their accomplishments, their performance, or in the superficial.

2 Ways to Remind Your Daughter That She is a Masterpiece:

1) Read the following verse to your daughter, print it out and give it to her, memorize it together, or think of a different way to share this verse with her: Ephesians 2:10 (For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.)

2) Download the song from itunes called “You’re Mine” by Carly Escoto for yourself and also for your daughter. Powerful, and great music to be playing in your daughter’s ears.

Assuming you are a dad reading this, I appreciate and thank you for being willing to be a positive voice in the life of your daughter – she listens to you more than you know!

Kristy Fox

 

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Last February, I wrote a funny little blog regarding the “10 Rules for Dating my Daughter.” It received so much interest, that a ton of Dads started asking for a shirt depicting those 10 Rules. So, for fun, I made a small quantity of those shirts and announced them in an APRIL 1 blog – CLICK HERE TO READ.

The picture ended up going viral on Father’s Day. Since that time, it has been shipped to over 58 countries and my wife now has a little internet business where she sells these shirts to anyone who wants one. It has been fun to see Dads everywhere rally around the concept of protecting their daughter. This shirt has brought Dads further into this important conversation.

People started asking about the “next shirt” and so we came up with the perfect companion shirt. Every dad who bought the “Rules” shirt will also want to pick up this shirt entitled “5 Things you should know about my Dad.” This is a shirt for your Daughter. Think of the two of you wearing these shirts out together! It will be a real conversation piece.

front Wear your shirts together!

Reese

 

On the front it says “Daddy’s Girl” and on the back it lists the “5 Things you should know about my Dad.”

  1. He is a former MMA Champ (Yeah, right!)
  2. He is an excellent Marksman (Probably not)
  3. He has a shovel and a backyard (Maybe)
  4. He has anger issues (hopefully not, but he doesn’t t need to know that)
  5. I am his princess (FOR SURE)

shoulders

Helm and nate

This, all on a pink shirt, cut perfectly for girls and available in small sizes. If you want a closer look at the shirt, or you already know you have to have this shirt, visit the online store found at.

www.myfatherdaughter.com

Back

 

Let’s keep this important conversation alive as we wear our Father/Daughter T-shirts.  And let’s not confuse the strategy here. It’s not about the shirt and it’s not about the few bucks being made on production. It’s about bringing Dad’s closer into the conversation about being better Dads to their daughters. It’s about gaining more followers to the blog and inspiring Dads to be better for the sake of our girls.

Enjoy

Alan & Sharon Smyth

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Emotional Jet Lag

Dr. Don Worcester —  December 12, 2014 — Leave a comment

We are all prone to take trips in our head while we walk through and

work through the day we are actually living in. Many of us are

“Frequent Flyers” on these little jaunts into our past and our

imaginary future. The journey out of today is often a fast and easy

ticket. It is not however a free ticket. Take a quick trip into your

past and you’ll likely return with more baggage than you left with.

Things you “Could” have done, “Should” have done and ” Would” have

done if you had only known, only realized the fallout from your action

or inaction. On your return trip you will find some extra luggage with your name on it.

These are heavy bags, things like regret, shame and bitterness.

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Tired of trips into the past, excursions into your imaginary future are

always available. The only limit here is your imagination. You can

visit some future day and picture yourself in some dire, lonely and

unbearable circumstance. You can imagine the hopelessness and despair

you will feel. These trips should be easy to avoid, strangely they are

not. We are drawn to them the same way we are to an auto accident on

the side of the road or a bad carnival ride. Trips into tomorrow and

beyond often leave us feeling anxious, unsettled and internally

distressed.

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Today is the only day you can actually live in. Living well in the day

your living in is simple; it’s just not easy.

Start by canceling your trips into Yesterday or Tomorrow. You and I

will never have a better or different past, so relax and do your best

to show up today. Take a breath, lean in and try to keep the cheese on your cracker.

Tomorrow will show up right on time. It may or may not look like anything you’re expecting.

You do not know for sure because you are not supposed to know for sure.

Humans are not task with this kind of knowing; they are task to show up, so do that.

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Dads need to be present. Your daughter is growing up one day at a time.

She cannot and will not go on these trips into yesterday or tomorrow.

Don’t miss the opportunity to connect, to serve, to laugh, to listen, to pray, to bless, today! Stay in today.

None of us need the Emotional Jet Lag of these very expensive and habit forming trips. Let’s work harder to

find the Good Stuff in front of us and around us. Somewhere in this day there is a treasure waiting to be found, don’t miss it.

 

Grace and Peace

Dr. Don Worcester

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I love this time of year and especially the gap between Thanksgiving and Christmas, a time to pause and remind ourselves how very much we have to be thankful for. What if we challenge ourselves to pause and remind ourselves how thankful we are for our kids, and also take time to remind them of the things we are so thankful for about them.

I think we tend to assume people know we are thankful for them or that we appreciate things they do, but we need to actually tell them! I had a friend come home from a memorial service just last week and tell me how she wished she would have said those things to her father-in-law while he was still alive. She asked he question – why do we hesitate to share with people why we are so thankful for them?

So many girls try so hard to earn the affirmation of their fathers, and many girls never feel like they can live up to their father’s expectations or feel like they can “get it right”. My husband is a coach and he shares the recent statistic – a kid needs 10 positives for every negative thing said. Not sure about you, but my ratio isn’t always that good with my kids. Dads, you have life-giving words for your daughter within you that often go unspoken. Please know that she is craving those. It may be uncomfortable for you – that’s ok, please still try it – typically the best things we do are a bit uncomfortable at first!

In some of the girl’s groups I have been a part of we have passed around papers with someone’s name on it. We then pass these around and everyone writes words of thanks and affirmations on the paper for that person. Girls have shown me papers they have saved for years and that they treasure! How cool would that be for them to have something like that from their dad? Something that can remind them of the love you have for them, something they can treasure and pull out when they need it, something that can remind them of how they should be treated by a future spouse or boyfriend.

It’s possible that the best gifts we have for one another don’t cost us anything!

Here’s the idea:

– Write a list of 10 specific things you are thankful for about your daughter (if she is too little to read, write it anyway and put it in a box for her so she can read them when she’s older )and put the list somewhere she will see it – her mirror, her dinner plate, her door, etc!

Stop. Grab a piece of paper right now. And do it!

2 Minutes of your time could be a life-long treasure for your daughter!

Thanks for leaning in,

Kristy Fox

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juxtaposition
— noun

“an act or instance of placing close together or side by side, especially for comparison or contrast.”

This past weekend I experienced a dramatic example of a “Juxtaposition”. Two “side by side” experiences which demonstrated a stark contrast.

I ran into “Monica” and she offered that she was 50 years old. The topic of conversation was the “Father / Daughter” relationship. She picked up my book, “Prized Possession” and began to tear up. She then volunteered that “my Dad didn’t love me” and talked further about how wounded she was because of it. We spoke about the seminar that Kristy Fox and I have developed aimed at helping Dads be better Dads.

With a distant and hollow stare and tears in her eyes, she said “Do you ever ask Dads why they don’t step up? Why it’s so hard for them to love their daughters?”  It was clear to me that Monica was hurt and wounded. It was clear to me that at 50, she had not yet recovered from the neglect she had experienced from her Dad. She let me know that she was unemployed. I tried to give her a copy of the book, but she wouldn’t or couldn’t accept it.

Here is the Juxtaposition….

After she left, I opened up my Instagram app and as I scrolled down through the pictures, I saw the following post from Hannah. Hannah is the daughter of my good friend Stu (whom I featured in a recent blog) CLICK HERE to read about Stu & Hannah.

hannah graph

Clearly Stu has been the kind of Dad that Monica wished she had. Clearly Hannah is off to the start that Monica never got, yet deserved.

Here is my point ….

Are you aware that your actions and involvement with your daughter today will last her whole lifetime? She will either coast through life off the blessing you give her or she will struggle through life trying to heal from the wound you leave her.

If you are more like Stu, great job! Way to go! Keep it up!
If you are more like Monica’s Dad, busy, distracted and selfish…. Wake up! Take your eyes off yourself, re engage in your family!

It’s important…. Really, really important for the girls in your life.

Engage Maverick!

Alan

 

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